All My Children Ep. 1

Isn't it funny how the Universe works? Sometimes our hearts desires are granted but not necessarily in the manner we requested. Nevertheless it comes with an enormous feeling of relief.

This afternoon I was earnestly considering alternative part-time living arrangements for D-Max (as he now refers to himself), as his teenage boorish antics have become too much for this tired, overworked single mom to handle. Add that to an extremely stressful and hazardous occupation; and a five year old Prima Donna a.k.a. Diva; and you have walking time bomb ready to explode.

As much as I detest the idea of D-Max spending more than a nano-second with the Sperm Donor; I felt it was time for him to leave his party, come to my party and take responsibility for the dilly dallying of his dick. Next week I celebrate the 11th anniversary of our divorce and whilst we haven't received so much as tuppance during the decade and a pinch, and I certainly don't expect to receive in the coming decade; some paternal discipline would not be amiss. So the plan was to call Sperm Donor tomorrow and inform him that his spawn will be living with him on weekends.

Since T and I separated in January I have been taking strain with the kids. He was the firm disciplinarian and I was the softy wrapped around their little respective fingers. Mommy was there to wipe the snot, the tears and the blood. I was the good cop and now I'm expected to take on the dual role of mother and father and it's unnatural for one person to play both roles effectively.

Arrrgh!!! I screamed to the Universe, I NEED HELP!!!